Do Vampires Suck?

Robyn Riley wrote an article in the Sunday Herald Sun taking a stand that "vampires are bloody annoying."

I think we can all agree that vampires seem to be everywhere these days. Lurking in movie theaters, television shows, and of course, bookshelves. This isn't the first time in recent history that vampires crept out of a popular book and overtook our popular culture. (Anyone else still remember Lestat?) I'll even admit to being a bit of a vampire fangirl, especially in my younger more "black lipstick" days. I watch True Blood, spin Concrete Blonde's album Bloodletting, and have a hard-bound gold cover copy of Interview with the Vampire. So naturally I must be jumping for joy about all of the new vampire blood on the scene (pun intended). Right? Wrong.

Let me be open about this: Yes, I read Twilight. And I hated it. (You can direct your hate mail here, care of Tara.) Perhaps it's my English degree snobbery, but I can't get past the fact that Meyer can't seem to write her way out of a paper bag. (Quoth the fans: "Sure, it's not the best writing, but it's soooo good!") Bad writing. Wooden characters. The excitement of watching linoleum curl. And a subtext that makes my teeth itch. Not a winning combo. Plus, vampires shouldn't sparkle, but we've all covered that at great length by now. Now we have movies, with equally bland dialogue recited by equally bland actors. And don't even get me started on what they've done to werewolves...

So what are we (I speak now to my fellow fans of the good old fashioned bloody fanged vampire) supposed to do in this flooded, and watered down, vampire market? We could join the haters and renounce our love of all things fanged. Or perhaps we could throw in with the Twihards and just embrace the fact that we have a lot to choose from. Instead I suggest taking a third road: dig through the pile, set aside the inferior works, and embrace the gems. Not sure where to start? Here are a few favorites from a couple of us here at the Firehouse to get you started.

- t

1. Interview with the Vampire - Anne Rice

2. The Passage - Justin Cronin

3. I Am Legend - Richard Matheson

4. The Golden - Lucius Shepard

5. Death Masks - Jim Butcher